The message to move north came in the form of a vision in 2003. The message to return to Florida came as a resounding "YES" and my spirit doing flip flops in November of 2008. I hadn't had enough money to buy an outhouse in Florida in recent years, so I had no idea the market had declined sufficiently for me to purchase a place for myself and my daughter's family to live. If it weren't for God, the market could have changed back again without it occurring to me to check things out.

Besides, I didn't want to leave Churchman Avenue. So much was happening and it was thrilling to watch the changes, I couldn't bring myself to consider not being a part of it. I wanted to continue with my parttime job as a community organizer as well. It was the most fulfilling job I'd ever had. I thought I could just visit the Florida house for my six week allergy season each spring and fall, remaining a part of the community I'd adopted and been adopted by.

My daughter and her husband chose the house within driving distance of the school where she teaches. As they shopped, I could not help but take note of the fact that any house they looked at in one community seemed to be acceptable to the spirit while anything outside of that one community got a negative reaction. To me, this was another confirmation I was on the right track and I considered it confirmation #2.

One evening I was speaking with the Prophet on the phone and he said something about God instructing him to get everything in place before July. When he made that statement, I thought my spirit was coming right out of my chest. Sometime later my brother was talking about world conditions changing by July and I got the reaction from my spirit again. This spiritual reaction convinced me that I also had some kind of a July deadline, but I resisted. I would go down in April, but I'd have to be back on Churchman before July in time for all the preplanned summer activities. Even though I learned a long time ago not to disagree with God's whisperings, I did it anyway.

God does not look kindly upon his children resisting his authority. He knew I couldn't afford to maintain an Indiana residence without my job. My job went away. I had to stay in Florida. I desperately searched for a parttime job but could not find anything. My son back in Indiana was able to rent out my home there and have it occupied within a week. Now I had additional income without a job. God is being very clear here. I went to church and the minister, while chastising some of his congregation, quoted from a text in the Bible which indicated we are to stop complaining and abide in love. That hit home again.

When I tried to talk to God about a job, all I heard was "plant a garden". When I tried to talk to God about volunteer work, all I heard was "plant a garden". It is soooo hard to transition from 24/7 community involvement to spending all your time in a garden, but I'm learning. I'm learning about the wonderful peacefulness to be found in a garden early in the morning and late in the evening. I feel His closeness as I work in the garden. I have been so busy germinating seeds and getting ready for August when the seedlings can go into the ground in SW Florida that I haven't been writing at all. For nearly two months, I haven't been able to get anything down on paper or on the web.

"Life is, or should be, nothing but a struggle to seek truth: yet what we seek is really the truth that we already possess. Truth is mine in the reality of life as it is given to me to live: yet to take life thoughtlessly, passively as it comes, is to renounce the struggle and purification which are necessary. One cannot simply open his eyes and see. The work of understanding involves not only dialectic, but a long labor of acceptance, obedience, liberty, and love." --Thomas Merton. Conjectures of A Guilty Bystander (New York: Doubleday and Company, 1966): 184.

Jane Mullikin
Spirit - Finding Hope in a World of Uncertainty

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