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A Mother's Hard Choice

I find it ironic that I am writing this particular piece on Mother's Day. I have been on the phone for some time with a mother who is faced with some hard decisions. The man in her life has put her in the position of choosing between him and her children. With the hormones screaming "take care of me", everything's so foggy it feels more like a choice between being true to oneself or taking care of one's children.

She is a loving mother and her mind is calculating the cost to her young son who is acting out his disapproval of the boyfriend through serious misbehaviors. She will determine to let go of the boyfriend for a while then the "if" and "but" pleadings begin to overwhelm her determination and she wilts one more time. Then her son runs away from home again and, as a result, she resolves to stand firm again.

I understand her dilemma and I understand her wavering. I also know about that other "but" which is being drowned out in the chaos--the one which is quietly whispering, "but the price is too high".

As I listened to her and felt her pain, my mothering instincts kept charging forward with sympathy strokes and consoling words until from within I heard the admonition to "stop" for my responses were giving her permission to continue her wavering--she needed to walk away from the situation long enough to calm herself and then to list the "pro's and con's" followed by a time of reflection before God, drawing upon His strength--allowing him to help her work through the chaos and find peace.

"As you pray and spend more time contacting your Higher Power, the feeling and conviction may grow within you that much, much more is possible spiritually than you ever allowed. Regardless of who you are and what you’ve done, an Ocean of Comfort, Love, and Truth is available to you. You have the power within you to realize God." --Michael Goddart

Jane Mullikin
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